What Do I Get My Brother-In-Law? – Carpenter, Sabrina


My mom loves her purse, daddy loves his telescope

Sammy loves his spy kit, Peter loves his jump rope

Ooh, yeah

My sister Amy gets a bike, brother gets a tambourine

And Amy’s husband, Dave, gets a, uh, pass

My mom loves cashmere, my father loves photography

And Amy’s husband, Dave, loves Amy

Giving gifts fills me with joy

Wrapping up each little toy

Eyes so brightly ooh and ah

Now what do I get my brother-in-law?

Hey, you haven’t given me anything yet

Right

Sammy is a whiz at math, Peter is an athlete

Amy’s an adventurer and her husband Dave

I don’t really know a lot about

I think he mentioned baseball

Is cash faux pas?

Maybe he likes IPA’s

Who is my brother-in-law?

Giving gifts fills me with joy

Wrapping up each little toy

Eyes so brightly ooh and ah

What the … do I get my brother-in-law?

I like food and I like pants

And I like blue and I like music

And I like sports

Okay

I got you a journal and your new perfume

I’m not gonna give you a gift until you give me one

Who is this man? What does he do?

I’ve known him ten years and I don’t have a clue

Ooh, yeah

So what? He just hands out?

Yeah, when he’s not at work

What’s his job again?

Oh, I forget

Giving gifts fills me with joy

Wrapping up each little toy

Eyes so brightly ooh and ah

Seriously what the hell do I get him?

Here is a shaving kit, here is a bracelet

And for my brother-in-law

A phone charger

I love it, I always needed one of these

You’re so interesting

Where did you get this? You’re like a genius

You’re really something special, Sabrina, may I hug you?

Yeah, okay

You really made this awesome Christmas, I really care about you

Honey, stop hugging my sister

Oh, I’m sorry about that

What the fuck do I get my brother-in-law?

The Anxiety of Gift-Giving

Sabrina Carpenter’s “What Do I Get My Brother-In-Law?” is a witty and relatable exploration of the perennial holiday dilemma: finding the perfect gift for that one family member you barely know. With sharp humor and disarming honesty, the song captures the narrator’s mounting anxiety as they confidently select presents for loved ones—only to hit a wall when it comes to their sister’s husband, Dave. The lyrics bounce between playful self-reflection and escalating desperation, painting a vivid portrait of the modern family dynamic.

Laughing Through Uncertainty

Carpenter’s storytelling shines as she highlights the awkwardness of not quite knowing someone you’ve known for years. The confusion over Dave’s interests, his ambiguous job, and the ultimate fallback gift—a phone charger—underscore the relatable struggle of wanting to give meaningfully, even when details are fuzzy. The song’s charm lies in its honest admission of imperfection, making listeners feel seen in their own gift-giving misadventures.

Song Credits

Artist: Sabrina Carpenter
Songwriters: Sabrina Carpenter


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